So, it's kind of funny...Since the day I moved here, I've wanted to visit "home."
I wanted to feel the warm sunshine wash across my face and breath in the salty ocean air. I needed to have an ABC omelet and a chai tea latte at Honey's on the 101, and meander through Anthro. I desperately needed to stroll the beach, and feel sand between my toes. I craved Rico's breakfast burritos, I swear I even dreamed of them- I had to have one stat. I wanted to spontaneously drive the ten minutes to my parents house to eat dinner and watch American Idol. I needed all these things.
Well, last month I decided to actually do it. Nash, Jayne and I packed up our things and headed west to California. We couldn't have been more excited! Nash was constantly talking about the beach (because he had heard me speak of it so many times) and how he wanted to see "Nema, Gpa, Auntie B and Unk C!!!!"
We spent a little over three weeks there. We stayed with Nema, Gpa and Auntie B. Shall I say we invaded their home and basically took over with all of our stuff. They didn't mind. They wanted us there as badly as we wanted to be there.
We did the things I had been longing to do. Although twas' a little different than I had imagined with two babies! We decided to do the fun stuff, like visit a bajillion parks, hang out at Legoland, visit the animals at Safari Park, run around at the beach, eat delicious Mexican food and spend lots of time with the people we love.
The notion of "home" is quite different when you don't actually live there anymore. Something doesn't feel right being there as a visitor. Something was definitely missing. It was actually a hard pill to swallow. I wanted so badly to feel like I was where I belonged, but it just wasn't happening. Please, don't get me wrong, I was over the moon to be there and see my family, but it just wasn't the same. Going there made me realize how I am totally okay with being here. I missed my home, my friends, and Mr.G. I missed all the things that make something a home. It's not necessarily a location...It's where you've set up shop as a family.
San Diego will always be my home in the sense that it's where I came from, where my roots are. But with Army life, home will be many places. It will be where we all lay our heads at night, where we gather around the table for early morning breakfasts, where we will whisper secrets, tell jokes and laugh together, where we will all be supportive of each others ambitions. I am no longer aching to get away. I am so grateful that I am now at peace with being in my home.
Here, with my family, in Alabama.
